Last updated on September 20th, 2022 at 03:19 pm
My dream of inspiring young women is not just to offer hope for women, but for men too.
The men in my life have broken cultural boundaries to be good dads and husbands. Some, like my grandfather, have sacrificed their last penny to see to their family’s needs and happiness.
My father’s sacrifices made such a big difference in our daily lives. Others, like my husband, refused to let people interfere with his own personal search for happiness and the love that he was determined to have in his life.
To these men, I owe my life and a great amount of gratitude for all they have done for me.
My husband, Aslam, was one person I never saw being a part of my life. We knew each other on a professional level for four years. I will not lie, there was not an inch of attraction on my part. He was a business partner to my dad and my colleague while I was studying — that was it — nothing more.
After deciding to give the relationship a chance, (and might I add that I’m happy that I did even though I had my doubts–what girl doesn’t?) we’ve shared many happy years together. I’ve seen our love develop into something unbreakable, further forged by the birth of our little girl.
Aslam and I never wanted kids, but as the years went by we started imagining having a mini-us.
The child talks became more frequent, more real and after months of weighing all our thoughts on the subject, we decided we’d give it a try.
What we didn’t plan on was conceiving so soon after agreeing we’d like to become parents.
But that all changed in March of 2011.
It was during a very bad stage of gastric flu that I ended up in the emergency room for dehydration. We knew the signs were there but we were too nervous to let reality sink in. Could I possibly be pregnant after just one month of trying?
No way.
To our surprise, on the X-ray screen, there was a head, body, arms, and legs moving about in black and white. There, right before our eyes was an 11-week-old fetus. It was a very teary, emotional moment for both of us. I don’t know if it was joy, fear, or both.
We never imagined being so far pregnant.
We both completely enjoyed my pregnancy. My favorite part was my husband driving to McDonald’s at 2:00 a.m. in his Pj’s for my cravings for those french fries!
I remember the day he went on paternity leave for a month. It was on the 9th of September. We had just 11 days left before the baby was to arrive.
We planned to paint, redecorate and finish all the last-minute shopping before she arrived.
But as life should have it, at 8:45 pm that very first evening, my water broke.
On the drive to the hospital, I have never seen my husband so nervous in his life. The first pains came while we were in the car and the labor pains grew stronger and stronger. Why does a drive that seems so short when you practice it, seem so long when it’s “time”?
Two hours after being admitted I was moved to the labor ward. I was laying in a warm bath while experiencing pressure waves. I was not afraid because the man of my dreams held my hand through every single wave. We’d breathe and count to 10 together. I never felt so safe in all my life. Having my husband there was all that I needed.
By 2 am, our little girl was ready to meet us. I was exhausted. Everything had happened so fast and now it was time to push. With every contraction, Aslam squeezed my hand saying, “You doing great. Baby, we are almost there!” Before we knew it, our new baby was crying.
The look on my husband’s face was priceless. He was such a proud dad.
He watched how the nurses prepped our little girl so we could hold her. I kept hearing, “Daddy is here, don’t cry my angel.” (I’m crying just thinking of that moment…gosh, where’s my tissues).
My husband, Aslam was afraid to hold the baby. I can remember how awkward he looked holding a newborn. Personally, I think he was freaked out by the small body of an infant.
Since that incredible day, we have been through the ups and downs of parenting. Nothing prepares you for this journey. All you can pray for is a partner that is loyal, supportive, and dedicated to making it work.
Seeing your baby grow up is a sweet blessing you never imagined.
There is this feeling of elation that the Lord has trusted you with one of his angels to care for and raise into adulthood. Our little girl, Aliya is the apple of her dad’s eye. Each day when he walks through the door from work she has the biggest smile on her face — a true daddy’s girl in the making.
It’s amazing to experience watching this man who once was afraid to hold the baby transforms into a dream father. Every Father’s Day, he should be proud of all that he does for us as a family and as a dad. He has surprised me by being such a natural at parenting. I’m proud of him too.
As he would say,
Any man can father a child, but it takes a specific kind of man to be a ‘daddy’
Today I want the world of dreamers to know that my big dream is supported by this amazing man, who is such an incredible father to our daughter. We are truly blessed to have him in our lives.
And a shout out to all the men out there who support their family’s dreams. You are a very important part of our dream journey. Happy Father’s Day.
Sue Levy is the founder of the South African Just Pursue It Blog and Inspirational Women Initiative. She’s a motivational writer and media designer, who is obsessed with everything inspirational with a hint of geek. She thrives on teaching women how to be brave and take big chances on themselves. You can find Sue on her Twitter page @Sue_Levy.
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