Last updated on June 30th, 2022 at 06:15 pm
Before the age of 55 attracting a man didn’t seem to be a problem for me at all. What happened? A slight weight gain, a sagging of the skin under my chin – “joules” is what my mom calls it – and the realization that I’m not 25 anymore.
I am being too hard on myself.
Being a women who has experienced a good share of attention over the years, I actually believed I would escape the sagging skin and the graying hair. As my dream continues, I’ve talked about the many different places, and ways, to meet men.
I have even discussed what to do if you have shut ourselves off emotionally, and what it takes to open yourself up to love again. But how do you find acceptance with yourself as you grow older? And will the man you want, want you in return?
Will men love me as my hair becomes thin, course, and gray – in several places. What if I become sick? What if I have to take tiny little pills every morning with my coffee? Here I am using that mirror again – can you tell? I’m chicken-boning myself, as I ponder this image of me – the older blond girl.
Why does the possibility of dating bring up these issues for us women?
I know there are young girls out there chicken-boning their beautiful appearance, as they get ready for going out tonight. They are standing there, looking at a beautiful girl and not seeing her – not seeing her for all that she is.
She’s only thinking – am I good enough?
Does it ever end?
Good lord people – I have grown children.
And here I am, noticing that after sitting for too long a period of time at the computer, I have these “oh my God” moments when I stand up – where every joint in my body begins to scream.
If this is what has happened at 55, what happens when I get to 60 or 65?
I did say that I picked dating, and falling in love again, like a dream – right?
Okay, breathe.
I say feel your fear feelings and do it anyway. Last week I was the maid-of-honor at my best friend’s wedding. You will be proud to know that I actually did some flirting and enjoyed myself. It was a great opportunity to step out of my comfort zone.
I felt attractive.
I allowed myself to have fun.
Don’t faint.
At one point, I noticed that I was searching the crowd for a handsome, attractive man. I stopped myself and remembered my expectations –
Give me a man who is comfortable growing old. A man who has a slight weight gain, thinning hair, no hair, or hair going gray. Maybe even throw in some joules to match mine.
I want a man who can find the same self-acceptance with himself as I must – if I am going to land a really great guy.
I’m ignoring the Internet websites telling us that all older men like younger women. I look at the women here in 8 Women Dream and I don’t think you could find a kinder, more loving, more fun bunch of women if you tried for 30 years. Women like these ladies are a rare thing. Men should be lining up to find out more. I know there must be great guys out there. I just have to figure out how in the hell to find them.
Maybe I’ll flap my joules on Highway 101 with my window down and a kindred spirit will spot his future mate as I drive by.
Yeah. it could happen to me.
Perfect as I am after the age of 55.
Veronica
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