Last updated on May 20th, 2013 at 11:31 am
Motivational Speakers Deal With Fear Every Day
We often think that reaching our dreams is a matter of being good enough, having the talent, getting noticed, being in the right place at the right time, being better than the others, working the hardest, or knowing the right people. While all of these might play a part, I think that what really stops many women from going after their dreams is good old-fashioned FEAR.
Even motivational speakers fight fear on a daily basis. I hear it over and over again in the letters I receive from women all over the United States:
I Know What I Want – But I’m Afraid
Fear is a normal human emotion that all of us feel when faced with a new dream. Our brain is trained for alarm when anything pops up outside of our normal comfort zone. When we see a zebra with pink stripes, our brains says “Stop! This is not normal. This is wrong. This does not calculate to what we have been trained to see as a zebra.”
Our mind takes in data at a rapid rate and processes it for us. So of course when we see something new, our reaction is to say, “Stop! This isn’t how it’s supposed to go.” Probably why it takes so long to break a habit.
Our comfort zone is made up of all things, well, comfortable. The routine, the path we are accustomed to, the way we’ve done it for years. It’s why so many people fight change – it feels weird. And it’s not comfortable. And when you are standing on the ledge, staring into the unknown, of course it’s hard to jump.
We like safe. And nothing about dreaming is safe.
Many times fear is disguised behind excuses like:
- I’m just too busy.
- I don’t have what it takes.
- I don’t have enough money.
- I’m just not talented enough.
- I don’t know what to do.
- My family thinks it’s dumb.
- I probably won’t be very good at it.
Don’t beat yourself up for being afraid. Honor and embrace the emotion.
Fear comes in many disguises. Take the mask off and find the reality. What is it you are REALLY afraid of?
It’s important to get to the root of your fear. Maybe it really is that you are afraid you aren’t good enough. Fine. Look at it in the eye. Face it.
I think what we often really fear is:
- the unknown
- getting our hearts broken
- rejection
- looking silly
- not being good enough in the world’s eyes
- or actually having it come true
Face the fear for what it is. Decide that you will not let it own you – but that you will own it.
I know, easier said than done. Don’t wait until you feel brave enough. You never will. To face your fear is not to make the fear go away – but to jump anyway. To acknowledge that this fear might actually come true – you might actually fail. See yourself rejected. See yourself not making it. And see that it’s not so bad. Do you still want it bad enough to try? Are you willing to risk the consequence?
Make Your Dream Bigger Than Your Fear
And then just jump. Do it. Take the step. Make the move. ACT. Don’t wait for the safety net. Move. Know that you might mess up right away. Get over it. Dust yourself off and keep going. Take another step. And then another one. Don’t be driven by the fear – you drive it.
Fear is a story you write. And as the author, you have the power to write a different story where the main character is brave.
Act brave. Think brave.
And one day you will feel brave.
Are you ready?
Take my hand and we’ll jump together . . .
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Kelly
