Photos of Me: A Study in Overcoming Fear of Photography

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Last updated on February 7th, 2013 at 05:34 pm

Hello Top Photographer dreamers …

I have lots of goals this year for my dream of becoming a pro photographer – the one I’m focused on right now is “let people take photos of me and share them.”

I realize some of you will think this goal is dumb.  But for those of you who understand it, maybe even deal with it yourself, I thank you for not judging me or laughing at my insecurities.

I hate having my picture taken.

Seriously.  I feel it’s part of the reason why I like being photographer.  I can control how things are set up, the shooting environment, and can edit myself right out of any image if I want – just with a little click of a trash can icon.

Bad hair day?  Looking fat? Not happy with the image?

Edit, Re-size or Remove. Done.

Problem solved, right?

Well, here’s the new problem.

I look back through photo albums, and I am noticeably absent for a good part of my son’s life.  Every once in a while, there I am – making a goofy face or showing up someone else in an effort to take the attention off me.

I see my parents, my sister, my entire family, lots of friends and complete strangers within these albums.

But clearly my son was raised by the invisible photographer woman. I have incredible shots of significant events – parties, weddings, school functions.  Lots of evidence of love and life being shared.

And I’m not in there anywhere.

How sad, even selfish of me.

So without worrying about it too much, I wrote it down:

Goal:  To be in photographs that others take, and share them.

I can tell you, it’s been beyond challenging.

I have plenty of opportunities to have my picture taken.  There are literally hundreds of photographers in my meet up group who shoot with me and at me every time we go out.  My closest friends are “those” people who always have a camera or cell phone in their hand.

The challenge lies within me, Dreamers – to get over myself and my insecurities about what I look like, and just be ok with it.

So my fellow Dreamers I will ask this –

• If you are the kind of person who doesn’t mind having your picture taken, notice that some of us don’t like it at all – and encourage us to get in the shot every once in a while.  We may balk, but secretly we thank you.
• If you are like me who hates being in photographs, put down the camera every once in a while and join in.  Don’t worry about hair or clothes or your smile – just do it.
• If you are brave and want to share the images you are in like I will from time to time, I’ll find a way to post them here in a  gallery and we’ll meet our goals together.  Ok?

I have to take it slow, so be patient with me.  Be patient with yourself, too.

Until next photo (of me) :)

Rem