Last updated on June 19th, 2024 at 12:05 pm
Earlier this week, I created a 30-plus-page book proposal and sent it to a literary agency. Sounds simple enough, right? After all, I’ve been a journalist for decades, writing this book for months and months.
I’ve been collecting toxic mom stories from strangers via a questionnaire and turning those into short narrative chapters.
I’ve been blessed with a great chapter editor (thank you, Terry N.) and nothing but support from my spouse and family. I’ve been inspired by everyone who submits dream stories to 8womendream, and every single supportive comment left by readers on social media has moved me forward. I’ve got so much support, and I appreciate it very much. So, why did I have to suffer a complete freak-out, spazzy, dork-athon melt-down when I actually hit the send button?
It certainly didn’t help that as I composed possibly the single most important email of my life, suddenly, my screen moved left, tearing down my entire email platform in the blink of an eye—TWICE! (Would there be anything worse than to email an agent without the attachment?)
My heart started racing, but I didn’t scream. Well, I didn’t scream out loud. No doubt my recent near-death panic attack is just part of the entire follow-your-dream experience.
I’m a huge proponent of baby steps when pursuing a dream. First, I go to the stationery store to buy pretty-colored folders and pens. I have a special pale green Bakelite egg cup that holds my pencils and rubber erasers, and it must be placed just so to the left of my laptop. I have a little saucer to the right on which my iced tea glass sits.
I sort of sneak up on any big writing project. I write in steady, short bursts. Over time, the pages add up. I’m about 75 percent done with the book, so it was time to start looking for an agent.
Apparently, the agent part is the point where I totally freak out. Who knew?
But the meltdown episode also taught me something. I learned what I can put myself through when making my dreams come true, and I want to share my thoughts about that with you.
5 ways (I know) when a dream is becoming real:
1. You declare your dream and develop a plan to achieve it.
2. You stick to your plan despite obstacles (including your own doubtful thoughts).
3. Suddenly, nothing makes more sense than asking for help and welcoming input.
4. At big milestones, you stare down your own fears.
5. At points when there is no forward movement, you keep the faith.
Writing a book proposal is much harder than writing a really, really difficult book report. It took me about a week to complete it—just choosing which chapters to include gave me nightmares. As I cross my fingers and search for an agent and publisher, I will undoubtedly need to focus like crazy to stay true to my dream of getting my book “Toxic Mom Toolkit” on bookstore shelves.
Never mind that extended focus is not my strong suit (my gym called today to remind me that I have a membership), but I vow to do my best.
The good news is I’m doing what I set out to do. I’m on track and accountable. And I’m happy despite shaking in my boots a bit.
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Rayne Wolfe is a versatile and accomplished writer, author, writing coach, and freelancer. Her notable work includes ‘Toxic Mom Toolkit,’ a memoir that not only shares her personal journey but also features mini-stories from women around the globe who, despite facing the challenges of a toxic mother, have grown into resilient adults. As a seasoned journalist, Rayne has served as a former business columnist for the San Francisco Chronicle/Examiner Sunday and the Seattle Times, showcasing her ability to distill complex topics into engaging narratives that resonate with diverse audiences.
Note: Articles by Rayne may contain affiliate links and may be compensated if you purchase after clicking on an affiliate link.
