Let Me Tell You How Dreams are Time Travel

Last updated on April 25th, 2012 at 09:54 pm

If you told me back when I started this crazy idea of getting a group of women together to chase a dream that I would also become a WordPress blog webmaster, I might have quite literally laughed so hard that I’d spit.

If you asked Heather of 8 Women Dream what I was like when she was first teaching me CSS and programming (with me being the writer-type thinking it didn’t make sense to design a site that way until the math side of my brain finally kicked in) she’d laugh that giggle of hers that let’s you know that she feels she survived.

Since when was I suppose to use Math for  English?

Me?

I remember many of my teenage lectures conversations with my mom where she’d be telling me that Math was the most important thing, “You use it in everything you do!” she’d snap after some teenage screaming loud talking match where I’d interrupt with, “Math is stupid.”

My older brother inevitably would yell something from the other room about the level of Math he was at when he was my age followed by the grades he received.  Wanting to be better at him at something, I’d huff myself down on the dining room table, slam my books open and start Math homework.

No one seemed to understand that I was a writer and Math, to me, was a waste of my talents.  (Have I ever said how glad I am that I have a teenage boy?)

But my point to this story is that sometimes when you set your dreams high enough you will grow in ways you cannot foresee.  I said that I wanted to have one of the best blogs in the world without really understanding how much muscle it would take — and ladies,  you either grow and expand to become your dream,  or you quit.

Quitting isn’t an option for me.

So this week if you were to ask me what I’ve done on my dream, I can tell you that I read every night to the point of headache.  After much search and study, I finally settled on a font for the site.  You may or may not have noticed but we’ve I’ve tried 8 different fonts out on the site in the last six months.  Fonts are Math too. Bleh.

I accidently stumbled across the font I wanted all this time (but I didn’t know it) while catching some late night reading.   I ventured out to John Armstrong’s BlurBoMat blog to see how the world of Instagram blogging is doing.  I read other blogs to see how other bloggers are coping and managing their sites through the ups and downs of self-publishing.

As I was reading his post about recent sleep issues with his kids adjusting to a separation, I realized that I do like his blog, but what I really like is his font (sorry John).  It feels intimate — like a book.  Once this light bulb went on in my head then I had to have that font right then and there.  I spent the next hour researching it.   Turns out it’s a Google font.

I hope you like it too.

I then ran a program that discovers all the broken links on a blog and darned-to-gum-in-my-hair — I’ve got a lot of them.  Every time I had a spare 10 minutes, I’d fix about 20.   This is the reality of my writing dream: I’m a publisher.

You see, I’m beginning to think my dream really isn’t a writing dream (don’t get me wrong — I love to write) with the outcome being a pile of published books … but about having my own online publishing empire.

The other night when I was thinking about all that I do Math behind the scenes on this blog I realized I was doing something I actually did back in high school.

The high school part before my dad got sick and I was happy at school.  I was the senior writer for my school newspaper.  My favorite part of being a journalist on our paper was working the story boards where I arranged the advertisements and the articles for print.  I’d obsess over every detail until I got the newspaper exactly like I thought it should look.

I’d argue over the front page with my teacher until he would give in.  On publishing day I’d race to school and stop by his first class to admire the paper before delivery.

To say I loved this class is an understatement — like saying tropical waters  are “kinda’ blue.” Seeing kids read the paper and argue over it made me high.  I loved seeing my words in print along with my close friends in our journalism group. It was even more exciting when our teacher had to defend what we said in print quite a few times.  He is still one of my favorite teachers to this day.

As I work on 8 Women Dream (and the Math involved) I am returned back there, back to age 16, working on that print board, fussing over every detail.  The publisher inside of me has reappeared as I push to expand this 8WD publication beyond its limits.

I said out loud that I wanted to have one of the best blogs in the world, but little did I understand that I was setting the foundation necessary to teach myself online publishing from the ground up and bring out my dream laid dormant.

Your dreams truly are about your past and it often takes setting a big dream goal to see that your real dream has been there waiting … waiting patiently … waiting for you to return back to the person you were meant to be.

Own it — even if it involves Math.

Catherine